Retraining my brain to be
intellectual and witty
is hard
when for so long i have
lived in my body
all juices focused
on growing this creature

i feel the rust that has grown over once-smooth stainless steel gateways
smell the lichen that coats once-sparkling pathways
roll over at 1130 wondering how i ever rose at 6 who does that?

having slowed down to a trickle was arduous
but speeding up again feels like a much repressed lust
and a creeping disease all at once.

to be more than an animal self is a crime and our human blessing
but i find that this humanness is alien - another life of mine,
long forgotten.